Can't Buy Me Luuu~huv.

The Beatles were right.  Ok, those words can’t have been uttered often, but it’s true.  Money can’t buy you love.  Part of me despises Valentine’s Day, and that’s exactly why.  I hate that love has become so equated with commercialism.  Don’t go out and buy overpriced chocolates for your sweetie.  Instead, make your own.  I promise they’ll cost less, they’ll taste better, and they’ll mean a heck of a lot more.  If you want it to be really special, why not make the candy together so you have an experience, a memory, and some fun time together?  Besides, who knows what chocolate dipping could lead to.  *wink, wink*

So here’s what you’ll need:

2 cups sugar
½ cup half & half
1 cup strawberries
4 Tablespoons butter
2 Tablespoons syrup
½ teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla

The first thing you need to do is butter a 9x13 glass pan and set it atop pot holders.

Now, throw your strawberries into the blender. 

I’ve heard a lot of people ask if a Vita Mix is really worth the money.  I have to say, if you regularly use a blender, and if it’s within your budget, it’s worth every penny.  So, puree your strawberries until they’re mostly smooth, but I like there to still be seeds.  Measure out ½ cup of the puree.  ¾ - 1 cup of whole strawberries should get you pretty close to that. 

Throw everything into a 2 ½ quart or larger saucepan. 

Heat over medium low heat and stir everything together.  At this point, I decided a little squeeze of lemon juice would be a good addition.

And squirted the camera lens.

My poor camera.   It’s had all manner of food on it, not to mention steam, water, and it’s been dropped on the kitchen floor a few times.  Ok, so keep stirring until your sugar is completely dissolved.  You want this to happen before the mixture reaches a boil.  If it’s getting too hot and it’s still grainy, turn the heat down.  Once it’s all dissolved, you can increase the temperature to medium or so, but continue to stir constantly until it reaches a boil.  Once it’s boiling, pop the lid on and set a timer for 3 minutes.  This is a good time to get a little dish of ice cold water.  You also need to wash all the crystals off of your spoon or get a clean one out.  After 3 minutes, remove the lid.  It should look something like this:

Time to start testing for temperature.  Get a little bit on your clean spoon, and drop it into the cold water. 

When it reaches the right temperature, you’ll just barely be able to gather it into a ball and pick it up.  It won’t hold its shape. 

While you’ve got it, rub it between your fingers to make sure it’s completely smooth.  If it’s not, you need to add ½ cup of water to your mixture and start the cooking process over again.  Pour the very hot mixture into your waiting pan. 

This is why it needs to be on hot pads, or a folded towel.  It’s extremely hot.  There will be lots of little bits on the bottom of your pan, but resist the urge to scrape it. 

Now just walk away.  It needs some time to cool.  You could wash up or put in some laundry.  Me?  I went to hang out with my little buddy.  But I had to annoy him first by taking his picture.  How could I resist?  Look at him all cozy in his new bed with his blanket and his dog. 

Ok, so it’s possible I could be slightly biased.  Anyway, after 15 or 20 minutes, you’ll want to start checking the temperature.  You want the bottom of the pan to still be warm, but not so hot that you can’t hold your hand there comfortably.  Now, prepare for an arm workout.  With a sturdy spatula, start pushing it into the middle of the pan. 

It will be really sticky and stretchy at this point. 

Just keep moving it around.  Stir, scrape, drizzle… whatever you feel like.  Just keep it moving.  It will slowly start to turn a little opaque.  There will be big bubbles appearing as you stir… don’t worry about it. 

Still very stretchy, and it just kind of runs and doesn’t hold any kind of shape.  Keep stirring.  In this picture, you can see it’s becoming even more opaque, but it’s still stretching and running.  Not there yet. 

This is what we’re looking for.  Still soft and pliable, but no longer runs or stretches.  See how it’s holding its shape on the spatula?

It could take a long time to get to this point.  Don’t get discouraged.  When my feet and back got tired, I went and sat down with it and just kept moving it around.  It doesn’t have to be quick stirring.  Just scrape it around slowly and lift it up and allow it to run back onto itself.  It will get there eventually.  It probably took 30 – 45 minutes for mine to finally fudgify.  Yes, fudgify.  That’s basically what we have here, after all.  Strawberry fudge.  Now, spread it into a parchment lined pan.

At this point, it needs at least a few hours to finish the reaction that’s happening inside.  Just cover it, and after 2 or 3 hours pop it into the fridge.  You can leave it over night, or start dipping, once it’s nice and cold.  When you’re ready to dip, pull the whole thing out of the pan, and place it onto a cutting board.  I like to use a pizza cutter for this, but you can use a big knife if you prefer. 

Cut it into small squares.  They should be small, maybe 1 inch squares.  They’re going to get bigger when you coat them in chocolate, and you want each chocolate to be about two bites. 

Place one piece into the palm of your hand. 

Roll it into a ball and place it on another piece of parchment.  You want to do it quickly because the longer it’s in your warm hands, the stickier it will become.  (That’s what she said!)  (Sorry about that.  I know it was crude, and this isn't one of Seeley's posts, but I just couldn’t resist) 

Ok, onto the chocolate.  I like to chop up good chocolate bars.  (Thank you Trader Joes for your fabulous pound plus bars)  Chocolate chips will work fine, though.  Just microwave whichever you choose in a small glass bowl for 30 seconds at a time, stirring well between each.  It should only get just barely warm enough to melt.  Throw in one strawberry ball at a time.  Roll it around and allow the excess to drain.  A fork works well for this. 

Carefully drop it onto another piece of parchment. 

Oops.  I obviously didn’t let that one drain long enough.  See the little puddle around the bottom?  Now, to make them pretty, I decided to place a little piece of freeze dried strawberry on each one. 

See how cute they are?

I decided to do some milk chocolate and some dark.  One more advantage to making your own, you can do it however suits your mood.  You could even dip some of them in white chocolate. 

I used imported, high quality chocolate, organic strawberries, organic sugar, and organic brown rice syrup, and this whole pan of chocolates still only cost me about $5 to make.  You won’t find quality ingredients like that in even the priciest candy shop, and for $5, you’d be hard pressed to even get a half dozen pieces.  So don't buy love this year.  Make it!

What are you going to do with your valentine this year?

Punt the Velveeta for a Super Bowl of Queso!

That’s right.  It’s Super Bowl time again.  Even though Hubby’s two least favorite teams will be playing, I have a feeling we’ll still be watching it, regardless of how much he rants about the Patriots.  Yes, we live in Massachusetts, and my husband hates the Patriots.  And although he also hates the New York Giants, his favorite team is the Jets, who are also from New York.  I don’t really get it.  I have a feeling it has a lot more to do with uniform colors than anything else.  Anyway, enough about the sport, let’s talk food.  More specifically, let’s talk Chili con Queso… or more commonly known as just Queso.  I have to admit that I love the stuff.  Warm, creamy, spicy, cheesy, what’s not to love, right?  I’ll answer that for you.  Velveeta.  Velveeta is a creepy, ‘cheese food’, product that requires no refrigeration and never goes bad.  Honestly, I’m surprised it even works as fish bait.  Unfortunately, probably every queso you’ve ever eaten was made from it, or something very similar.  Well, no more.  I wasn’t sure I could actually make a dip that would have the same creamy consistency using real cheese, but I did, and it is amazing. 

Here’s what you’ll need:   

18 oz. grated cheese (about 5-ish cups)
1 ½ cups whole milk
2 – 3 jalapenos, diced
½ onion, diced
2 – 3 tomatoes, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced (about 1 Tablespoon)
2 Tablespoons butter
2 Tablespoons flour
½ teaspoon salt
¼ teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoons chili powder
½ cup cilantro, chopped
¼ cup sour cream

The first thing you’ll want to do is dice everything up.  Then, in a sauce pan over medium low heat, melt 2 Tablespoons of butter and throw in your jalapeno and onion. 

Sprinkle over the salt, pepper, and chili powder. 

Stir the mixture and allow it to begin to sweat off some of its liquid.  After about 5 minutes, stir in the garlic.

Continue to cook the mixture for another 5 minutes or so, stirring frequently.  While it’s cooking you can go ahead and grate the cheese.  It’ll be much easier to do if you put it in the freezer for 15 minute or so first.  It’s very important to grate your own cheese for this.  The pregrated stuff doesn’t melt as well.  It’s also important to use cheeses that melt very easily.  I used about equal parts of Monterey jack and mild cheddar.

Once the vegetable mixture has cooked down and everything is mostly soft, add the diced tomatoes. 

Stir them around just long enough to cook off some of the moisture.  About 2 minutes.  Sprinkle the flour over the top of the mixture. 

Stir it in until it is completely incorporated and you no longer see any dry flour.  The mixture will be thick and pasty. 

Cook it for about a minute, stirring constantly, and then pour in the milk. 

Stir until the mixture become thick and creamy and comes to a boil.  You might need to increase the heat a little for that.  Once it’s come to a full boil, turn off the heat and throw in the cilantro.

Stir that in and allow the mixture to cool slightly before beginning to add the cheese.  There are two very important rules you need to follow in order to ensure you’ll end up with a nice creamy dip and not an oil clumpy mess.  First, it CANNOT be boiling when the cheese goes in.  Second, the cheese has to go in very, VERY slowly.  You want to add maybe ¼ cup at a time. 

Then stir it in and allow it to fully incorporate before sprinkling in the next addition.  If you have strings like this,

It’s not ready for another addition yet.  It should be smooth and creamy, with no stretchy, stingy, anything.  If the mixture cools too much, you might want to turn the burner back on to a very low heat, but be careful.  If it gets too hot, it will turn grainy and will eventually break.  If at any time, you start to see it becoming a grainy texture, remove it from the heat immediately and stir in a couple of ice cubes and a tablespoon of milk.  If you’re lucky, that will save it for you, but no guarantee.  Remember, low and slow is your friend here.  Continue to stir in the cheese until it’s all incorporated completely, then add the sour cream. 

Stir that in.  The heat will slowly allow it to melt and disperse into the mixture.  There you have it.  Creamy, delicious queso made without using any processed, cheese food product.  If you have a way to keep it warm at a very low temperature, that will keep the consistency the best.  If not, just cover it and serve it in small portions that can be eaten before it cools completely.  Serve with your favorite tortilla chips. 

Creamy, slightly spicy, and delicious.  The perfect accompaniment for the Super Bowl.

So, Pats or Giants?  Who are you rooting for?