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    Entries in epicness (10)


    Cover Me, I'm Going In

    You know how guacamole turns brown?

    I've tried keeping the pit in the container with it: doesn't work. Total bullshit; has to be some kind of urban legend.

    Add lime, you say? Totally did. Lots of it. It still went brown in the fridge overnight.

    I've tried an extra layer of lime juice on top. I've tried putting slices of lime on top. Neither worked. My lovely guac still oxidized into brown goo.

    Usually I press a bit of plastic wrap down onto the top surface of the guac before I put the lid on. This helps a bit, but since plastic wrap is actually slightly porous, there's always still a little bit of brown to scrape off.

    But this week, I ran out of plastic wrap. Crap.

    So, I tore off a chunk of foil and used it instead. I pressed it down against the flattened top of the guac, then put the lid on the container and fridged it.

    Holy crap it's still green! Two days later, my guac is as lovely as it was the minute I made it.

    Try it! Make guac! Cover it with foil! Tell me I'm not the only one this works for!




    epic sammich is epic

    There's nothing quite like muffaletta.

    This is my last post before school starts. And my last paycheque so I went nuts at the fancy Italian deli. That place is freaking dangerous. Imported salamis, locally made cheeses, a dessert cooler with my nose print on it...

    They even make fresh pasta in the store right in front of you. But I was not looking for hand hung linguini, oh no, I went straight to the back of the store (by some definition of straight that involves  stopping at the bakery, the jam aisle, the spice section, and the espresso counter) and started perusing the sausages.

    I do love a nice hard salami.

    Especially when it's stuffed into a muff... alletta.

    Oh, come on, I had to. As if you weren't thinking it.

    Muffaletta, the epic sammich of epicness

    What You Need:

    Olive Salad

    • 1 jar giardinera pickled veggies mix, hot if you like it that way
    • 1 jar manzanilla olives with pimentos
    • 12 kalamatas
    • 1 jar artichoke hearts
    • 1 jar pickled mushrooms
    • ½ jar capers
    • 2 cloves garlic
    • ¼ c parsley
    • 1 tbsp oregano
    • Vinegar
    • Olive oil

    The Sammich

    • 1 loaf of round sturdy bread
    • 100 g* dry salami
    • 100 g thinly sliced ham
    • 100 g pepperoni
    • 100 g sliced provolone
    • 100 g sliced emmenthal

    *100 g = 1/4 lb for those of you who live in the only country in the world not smart enough to switch to the metric system.


    What You Gotta Do:

    The first thing you need to do is make your "salad." I'm not sure exactly why it's called salad, it's not the kind of thing you'd eat out of a bowl as a first course, or even as a last one, but I can't think of some other way to refer to it. 

    Strain all the jarred stuff and dump it into the food processor.

    If the giardinera has large chunks in it, you might want to chop those up a bit first just for consistency’s sake.

    Coarsely chop the garlic and drop it in.

    Add the parsley and oregano, and black pepper if you remember to.

    Whiz this all for just a few seconds. You don’t want it too fine and homogenous or you lose the “salad” texture and end up with something more like a tapenade.

    You’ll probably want to scrape down the sides then whiz for just a few more seconds to get everything chopped.

    Spoon it back into the bigger jars, or if you have them laying around, 500 mL mason jars work great. You'll be able to fill about 2 of them. Don’t pack it down. You need space in there for the oil and vinegar dressing.

    Splash in a bit of vinegar, about 1 tbsp of vinegar for each cup of salad. White wine is best, but red will also work. Pour in olive oil until most of the space between the tiny chunks is filled.

    Put the lid on and give it a good shake.

    Let this marinate in the fridge for a bit. It’ll keep at least a month in the fridge, if it lasts that long. It does make great gift basket fodder, but since it needs to be refridgerated you’d probably have to do the whole “canning” thing if you wanted it to be shelf stable. I’m going to leave that part to Taneasha to tell you about some day.

    It's also great on a cheese and crackers plate, or as a pizza topping, and a few spoonfulls added to a bit of tomato sauce results in a tasty puttanesca perfect for spaghetti.

    Now, to assemble the sammich of epicness.

    Slice your round loaf in half horizontally.

    You want a good sturdy loaf with a crusty exterior and a dense crumb inside. French bread will not work, the insides are too squishy. A good sourdough will do the trick, and that's what I'd planned until I saw the loaf of olive bread at the Italian deli.

    Pull out the innards of the bread, leaving about a centimeter (half inch) of insides all around. You want the same buffer on the bottom and top of the bread.

    Freeze the innards for use later on as crumbs or as the bread in a bread pudding, sweet or savoury.

    The first layer is the olive salad. Top and bottom.

    I guess the rest is kind of up to you how you want to do it,

    but I suggest a single layer of each type of filling,

    with a bit more salad every three, four or five layers.

    Don't be shy about pressing it down and filling it with as much meat and cheese as possible. And make sure you get the layers all the way out to the edges of the bread.

    Once you've filled both halves, flip the top onto the bottom and press them together. I find it's easiest to do if the last layer on the top half is cheese. It seems to stick a bit better and there's less chance of things falling apart.

    Give it one last squish, then fold it up in a giant peice of parchment or wax paper.

    Giant. Lift the edges up and centre the sammich in the bottom. Roll down.

    When you get to the top of the sammich, tighten a bit, then press the sides down, fold them in like you would if you were wrapping a gift, then tuck them under.

    Leave it there as long as you can resist it.

    You can leave it in the fridge overnight even, just make sure you put it in something a little more air tight. This makes it a really handy make ahead lunch meal, like for a picnic or something.

    When you can no longer keep your hands off it, unwrap it and start slicing it into wedges. Belive it or not, it will hold together.

    I recommend slicing it into at least 6, but 8 is better, and do it all now.

    Even if you're not planning on eating it all, slice it. The individually wrapped slices keep quite well. It's also much easier to slice when you have the rest of it around to maintain the structural integrity of the layers.


    So pretty and so freaking tasty.

    What's your favourite layered thing?


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