Strawberry Lemonade Bars - The Mayhem continues!!

In keeping with the mayhem theme for this month, I thought I’d try something I’ve never made before, and rather than using a recipe, I’d just wing it.  Fortunately, things worked out in my favor this time. 

Ok, so perhaps strawberry lemonade bars are more fitting for a midsummer’s day, but I’m anxious for spring to start.  The sun finally came out here in Utah, and with Mother’s Day this weekend and the snow hopefully gone for good, I wanted to make something fresh, fruity, and fun.  What’s better than the refreshing tang of strawberry lemonade?  The sweet tart flavor of strawberry lemonade combined with chewy edges, a smooth, creamy center, and a tender, flaky crust.  That’s what. 

I know you’re drooling for them already, so let’s get started. 

For the crust:
½ cup butter, cold
1 cup flour
¼ cup powdered sugar
¼ teaspoon salt

For the filling:
2 eggs
1 teaspoon lemon zest
3 Tablespoons lemon juice
1 cup sugar
¼ teaspoon salt

Strawberry puree:
3 or 4 strawberries
1 Tablespoon sugar
1 Tablespoon lemon mixture

Before we get started, line a 9x9 pan with parchment and preheat your oven to 350°.  Then, in a mixing bowl, sift together the flour, powdered sugar, and salt.  Cut your butter into small cubes and toss them into the flour. 

If you don’t have a stand mixer, you can definitely do this with a pastry blender, or even your fingers.  If you’re lazy, like me, just turn the mixer on low and slowly increase the speed to medium.  Mix for about a minute or so until the mixture becomes crumbly, then dump it into your prepared pan. 

Press the mixture firmly into the bottom of the pan with your palm, or something flat like the bottom of a glass.  Bake for 20 minutes. 

While that’s baking, we’ll start on the filling.  Basically, just throw all the filling ingredients into a bowl and whisk them until they’re thoroughly combined.  Be sure to squeeze your own lemon juice.  The bottled stuff won’t cut the mustard here.  

Leave the whisk in the bowl.  You’re going to want to stir it again just before pouring it into the crust.

Now for the strawberry puree.  Wash and hull your strawberries, then throw them into your blender with the other ingredients. 

Blend on medium speed until it’s fairly smooth.  You want to keep the seeds intact, and a bit of texture is fine.  Pour the mixture into a plastic bag. 

When the crust has finished its 20 minutes in the oven, pull it out.  Stir the lemon mixture and pour it over the hot crust.  Snip one of the corners off of your bag. 

Cut a smaller amount than I did.  My strawberry mixture got a little out of control.  (Mayhem!!)

Ideally, you’d want twice as many passes as I got, with half the width in each, but oh well.

Drag a toothpick vertically through the mixture, alternating directions. 

When you’ve gone all the way across the pan, it should look something like this:

Place the pan back in the oven for another 25 minutes or so.  It’ll still jiggle a bit in the center, but be set enough that it doesn’t run.  Cool to room temperature and then refrigerate for 2 hours or so before cutting.  This is the reason I like using parchment.  When the bars are cold, you can run a knife along the pan edges and then pull the whole block out of the pan.  So much easier to cut.  Cut into squares and sprinkle with powdered sugar. 

The strawberry puree becomes slightly chewy adding to the lovely array of flavors and textures.             

 

As Seeley mentioned in her last post, things are probably going to be a bit crazy around here this month.  With my frequent bouts of panic (OMG!  In 13 days I'm moving all the way across the country to a place I've never even visited and leaving everything I know, and own, behind!!)  [see, there goes another one] and her, well... distractions, don't be surprised to see a fair number of mistakes and mishaps.  It's May(hem!!!)!

Walkin' holy

No, this is not about cowbell.

It's a silly way of saying guacamole.

I'm totally panicked and pressed for time here. You'd think that now that finals are over (omg breathe!) I'd be relaxed, but no. I've got a 2 week vacation coming up and I've gotta do laundry, buy hostess gifts, pack, clean my bathroom... Yes, I really do have to clean the bathroom, I haven't cleaned it in over a month because no housework is necessary when finals are approaching.

So, this week's post is actually only part of a post. I made a nice big TexMex feast way back in February when I had a house guest to cook with and for. It was awesome, but since I'm pressed for time, you're only getting part of it. I promise to post the rest ... eventually.

Guacomole

What you need:

• 2 avocados
• 1 jalapeno (pronounced jah-lap'-en-oh a la the Trailer Park Boys)
• 1 lime
• a handful of cilantro
• 1 clove of garlic
• salt

What you gotta do:

Finely mince the garlic and put it in a bowl.

Slice the jalapeno in half and remove the seeds and white membrane. Dice it into tiny bits and add it to the bowl.

Wash your hands. I'm freaking serious. Do it now. Don't wait until you're done preparing everything. One touch anywhere near your eyes, nose or mouth will leave you strangely tingly... on second thought, maybe that's your kind of thing. Never mind.

Remove as much of the stem from your cilantro as you can be bothered with. Depends on the day for me; sometimes I pluck every single leaf and some days I just really don't care. Slice it up a bit, and add it to the bowl with the garlic and jalapeno.

Run your knife around the lower equatorial area of the avocado. I know some people do this longitudinally, but latitudinally works too.

Twist gently to get the two sides apart. One half will have a giant freaking seed in it. 

Carefully, whack the heel of your knife, not the tip, the heel, the part closest to the handle, into the seed until it's good and wedged in. Now twist the knife and lift gently. Seed pops out! Yay! But now you have to figure out how to get the seed off the blade without slicing yourself open. Good luck.

Slide a tablespoon in between the skin and the flesh of an avocado half, then run it all around the edges and lift. Voila, perfect.

Now, I know I say 2 avocados in the ingredients, but you keep seeing 3 in the pics. Well, that's because I'm in the frozen wasteland and fresh produce is iffy at best in the winter (I made this back in February remember) and it's pretty common to get avocados that look like this when you cut them open.

They are usually salvageable. You can easily remove them from their skin like the one above and then use the spoon to scrape away the bruised or way over ripe parts.

So, dump the equivalent of 2 avocados into the bowl with all the rest of the stuff.

Now, the lime. Really, this part is to taste. I love lime in my guac. Lots of it. Lots. Did I say lots? Because I meant lots. But, my co-cooker and dinner partner prefers it to be a little more subtle. Of course we had to compromise. Add about half a lime's worth of juice to start, and adjust it until you're happy. 

So, before you can check to see if there's enough lime, you'll need to mash. Consistency is up to you. I've seen people make guac with diced avocado and I've seen it done in a blender. I prefer it somewhere in the middle. Chunky enough that it has texture, but mashed enough that it'll stay in a clump on a chip.

Now, it's time to taste it.

Don't use a spoon. Use whatever vehicle you plan on using to eat the guac. Why? Because every chip brand has a different salt content. If you salt to taste from a spoon, it's going to seem way too salty when you eat it off a salted chip.

Add whatever salt you need, and whatever lime you want.

Now, you've got a handy snack, or part of a fancy TexMex dinner.

The rest of which I'll show you another time.

For now, just add tequila. Make it a double.