Cramming my face off
Tuesday, April 12, 2011 at 2:00AM | Seeley deBorn 
It's exam time. I barely have time to brush my teeth, never mind cook.
There are flashcards on the back of the toilet, sticky notes on the walls, and my couch is covered in physics problems. If you think I'm making dinner this week, you are sorely mistaken.
I'm doing my best to eat more than coffee, tortilla chips, and beef jerky, but I've got 2 more exams to go, and I've had to wash forks to eat my last two meals.
Exams mean I don't have time to wash dishes either. Coffee cups don't need to be washed, only rinsed.
One of the few clean things left in the cupboards is the food processor. Yeah, I know, pain in the ass to wash, but there's really no other way to make pesto.
Pesto
What you need:
- Basil leaves
- Olive oil
- Garlic
- Pine nuts
- Romano or parmsan cheese (real cheese! not Kraft!!)
No, I didn't measure. I didn't have time to measure. There are finals looming! (um, yes, I know I promised to write shit down. I didn't mean I'd do it during exam week).
What you gotta do:
Tear the basil leaves up a bit, ripping the stems off. You'll have about a cup (measurement; happy? better be).
Put the leaves and the garlic and a bit of olive oil in the food processor.
Mine has a regular sized bowl and a mini-bowl. Mini is all you need. If you're doing this in a regular sized one, you might want to double the recipe. Double a recipe with no measurements. Ha. I kill me.
Put the lid on and run it.
If it's sticking to the sides, stop the machine. Or if it's like mine take the lid off. Poor safety engineers; they go through their days having to assume that everyone on the planet is a total fucking moron. Well, it's kinda true. Any time you think to yourself "no one's dumb enough to try that" you just guaranteed that some jackass will try it.
So, pesto. Scrape down the sides and pour in another blob (technical term, very foodie, an actual measurement) of oil. Replace the lid and let it whir a bit more.
Add some pine nuts. Some, more than none, but not too much.
Whir until the pine nuts are no longer discernable.
Now, the grated cheese. Can I say "to taste" here instead of telling you how much? Is did "to taste" a valid measurement?
And another whir.
Look! You made pesto.
Don't you feel fancy.
And what do we do with fancy pesto?
Well, I'm sure you could do something like some kind of grilled steak over linguini with a pesto and cream sauce, or mix it with chevre and fill butterflied chicken breasts with it, or mix it into cream cheese and bake it to make a creamy, cheesey pesto dip.
Me, I made pizza. (Dude, I'm in freaking university and I have a final exam tomorrow, what did you expect me to do?)
Slices of half stale baguette, smeared with pesto, topped with onion, tomato slices and chevre.
Baked at 350 until I decided I needed to take them out of the oven and get back to studying.
Would you tell me if I had pesto in my teeth??
Reader Comments (5)
Makes me sad I accidentally killed my windowsill basil plant (who knew plants need water?). Good luck with your exams!
Wait, plants need water? That explains a few things.
I notice neither of you said you'd tell me if there was green stuff in my teeth.
Just wait til I invite you over, and then serve spinach dip. :P
It's more fun if we don't tell you, and when you figure it out later you wonder, 'great, how long have I been walking around with green shit in my teeth?'
Zeese look gorgeous! I'll be right over.... BTW did you pass your test?